Previous edition: 2006.

The birth of Boris -- The death of Ali Kemal -- Small blond heads -- Learning to be a Johnson -- Greek before breakfast -- An Etonian performance -- Genuine bogusness -- The Oxford politician -- Boris in love -- Troubled times -- Our man in Brussels -- Twelve days a bachelor -- The fall of Darius Guppy -- A telly star is born -- Ape gets Ming vase -- Member for Henley -- Conrad Black's indulgence -- The start of an affair -- Sellotaping everything together -- The calm before the storm -- Operation Scouse-grovel -- The pyramid of piffle -- Toff fired -- Theatricals -- Overtaken by Cameron -- Roman civilisation -- Coming up on the outside -- How this book was received -- Mayor Johnson -- Generous errors -- Wrestling with the prime minister -- The merry England candidate -- Stuck on a zip wire -- 'Do you have a golden toilet?'.